Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Like a Box of Chocolates.

Like a Box of Chocolates

By:  Russ Stilwell

Tom Hank’s character, Forrest Gump, in the blockbuster movie of 1994 had one of the most famous lines from a movie of all time.  “My momma always said, ‘Life was like a box of chocolates.  You never know what you’re gonna get.”

 I would think that the 2011 Indiana General Assembly could be categorized much the same way.  You never know what you’re gonna get.

Who would have thought so much would have occurred in only one session of the legislature.  I guess elections do have consequences.  I would like to create a top ten, but the list just goes on and on and on and on.

In a session where the Republicans outnumbered democrats 60-40 in the House and quorum-proof in the Senate you would have expected the number one issue would be the budget, school reform, union bashing  or some other Governor Mitch initiative.

Nope, the #1 story for 2011 will be about the historic walkout by Pat Bauer and the House Democrats over the overreaching antics of the new-found House majority.

As the years go by, all the ramblings of political pundits on the myriad of issues and bills that took place in 2011 will pale in comparison to the defiant action of the House Democrats.  If you think things are bad now, just imagine what would have happened if the dems had stayed glued to their seats. 

The 2011 session will go down in history as one of the most sweeping, reform minded (both good and bad) legislative sessions in decades.  And it’s not even over yet!  Here’s some of my favorite “How do I explain this back home” initiatives. 

Voucher –School Reform #1:  Did I mention that we are going to have your state tax dollars going to private & religious schools?  Some even have the audacity to have us believe that this will not take monies from our public schools with this largest voucher proposal in the nation.

Merit Pay Reform #2:  Elimination of collective bargaining for all school employees and Merit Pay based on student performance.  Bet our school employees and teachers will pay close attention to election 2012!

Forced Consolidation Reform #3:  Let’s make sure that our small schools (less than 500 students) get $100 less per pupil funding than everyone else. Or you could just say we gave $100 more to everyone but them.  Bet this creative thinking works just fine for all those small schools in competitive House districts.  I’m looking forward to this explanation!  Surely this isn’t forced consolidation.

$150M more or $450M Less Reform #4:  Actually, this reform has two explanations.  You be the judge.  We increased K-12 funding by $150 million in the budget.  Or, you the budget are $450 million less than budgeted in 2009 for K-12.  Wanna bet that the R’s and D’s have completely different takes on this one?

UI Reform #5:  We finally corrected the UI fund and made it solvent.  Employers paid more and unemployed workers shared in the pain.  I would bet that the D’s will say that the R’s cut UI benefits 25% and for good measure gave a corporate tax cut of 25%.

Stick it to em Reform#6:  The R’s would have you believe our Hoosier state was finally brought into the 21st Century with logical and well thought out labor proposals that will grow our economy and create jobs.  Actually, I would think even the most ardent supporter of these draconian labor bills would say it was a “stick in the eye” of labor unions and working folks.  Or maybe just politics 101 political payback.

Union Busting Reform #7:  This list is actually too long to publish.  Eliminate Project Labor Agreements.  Make sure that our state employees never again belong to a union and ban collective bargaining for all state employees.  Ever wonder why they wanted a union?  Did I say fairness in the workplace and being treated as partners in our society? 

Right to Work Reform #8:  The Perfect Fix:  Once we do everything possible to offend anyone even remotely favorable of working folks and labor unions, let’s complete our agenda and pass Right-to-Work.  Sure, we won’t get any democrat votes but we can once and for all cripple those unions and their union bosses.  And in the process we can end the primary support for the Democrats.  Now, that didn’t work out too well, did it?  How many days did the dems stay out?  Did I say an energized democrat base in 2012?

Clean Up Reform #9:  A call to arms for our progressive Hoosier State.  Let’s make sure we change our constitution so we don’t have gay marriage even though we have a law already on the books and there has never been a gay marriage or the threat of a gay marriage in our state’s history.  While we’re at it, maybe the party of less government can make sure that local decision making is transferred to the state (guns, schools, taxes, labor, PLA’s, collective bargaining & bunches more). 

Say it ain’t so Charlie White Reform #10:  This is my favorite.  Let’s nominate an ineligible candidate for Sec State and see him win a landslide in our Republican state.  And once he’s indicted for felony election registration fraud . . .  and the Indiana Recount Commission rejects his removal . . . and a state court remands this back to the Recount Commission for another look . . . just change the law!  I’m sure the Senate party line vote had nothing to do with a GOP power grab to undo the tidy little mess they find themselves in.  Sure is hard to explain this one with a straight face.

And I didn’t even mention redistricting and a strong statewide ticket for dems in 2012.  Maybe we can save these for another day.  Our legislative initiatives really are like a box of chocolates.


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